If you’re tired—and I don’t mean “stay up too late scrolling” tired—but tired in your bones… the kind of exhaustion that sleep doesn’t seem to fix, the kind where even small things feel heavy—
You’re not lazy.
You’re not failing.
And you’re not imagining this.
When you’re an exhausted mom who’s doing everything, carrying the mental load, managing all the things, it’s no wonder you have no energy left.
What you’re experiencing has a name. And more importantly —there's hope to overcome it.
Welcome to Conquer Mom Stress—the podcast that helps you stress less and enjoy motherhood more. If you’ve ever crawled into bed at night completely exhausted, but still feel like there’s so much left to do, you are in the right place.
I’m your host, Jill Gockel—and I believe that motherhood is meant to feel joyful, not exhausting. Today, we’ll uncover what’s really fueling your stress and give you the practical tools to conquer it—so you can finally feel like the confident mom you were made to be.
Also, if you have a specific question or issue you’re stressing about, head over to jillgockel.com/ask to submit your question and who knows, you might just be featured in an upcoming episode so you can get practical, real-world solutions to the exact challenges you’re facing.
Have you ever had one of those seasons where you are doing all the things “right” - going to bed at a reasonable time, checking things off your list, getting things done like keeping the house running, caring for kids at home, doing it all like a busy mom does.
And yet… you felt completely drained and not just at the end of the day but dragging from the moment you wake up.
It’s like a mother exhaustion settles into your body and you’re a mom tired in a way that coffee can’t touch.
Yup, I’ve been there and not just because I don’t like coffee. In those seasons where exhaustion hits me like a freight train I would find my mind was constantly racing, yet unable to stay focused on things, my shoulders were always tight, and my patience thin.
I felt like an overstimulated mom, an overwhelmed mom, wondering what was wrong with me because I should be able to handle this.
There can be so many reasons moms feel this way - it can be a vitamin deficiency, poor sleep quality, blood sugar instability, even dehydration. But what I want to talk about today goes beyond the physical things that can cause mother exhaustion.
A problem I see in so many moms, myself included, is that the load you’re carrying is too much and you’re simply wore out, mentally, physically, spiritually.
Psalms 23:1-3
says “The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.”
Here’s the problem, being a mom means making sure your kids are cared for and getting what they need in life so you can raise them up to be successful, happy, healthy adults. Your greatest desire subconsciously is to guarantee this for your kids but the only way to guarantee it is to control every aspect of the situation.
And you know as well as I do that when it comes to kids, or life in general, very little is in your control. So what does the brain do? It tries to fabricate a sense of control so you feel like you’re in control even when you’re not. And do you know your brain’s favorite way to do this?
By worrying.
Worrying creates the semblance of control, a false sense of control because it keeps the mind busy. When you worry, your brain is actively doing something: scanning for threats, replaying scenarios, anticipating outcomes, mentally rehearsing responses. Sound familiar?
That activity tricks the brain into believing you’re preventing something bad from happening. In reality, nothing is being solved, but the mind feels occupied, and that occupation feels like control.
It’s really interesting because from a brain perspective, worry is the mind’s attempt to reduce uncertainty. Uncertainty feels unsafe, moms feel unprepared for what might come, so a mom’s brain says, “If I think about this enough, I’ll be ready for whatever happens.”
Worrying becomes a stand-in for action. Even though it doesn’t actually change the outcome, it gives the illusion that vigilance equals protection because in the grand scheme of things your brain is mimicking problem solving.
When you’re worrying, your thoughts sound responsible and caring: “What if they struggle? What if I mess this up? What if something happens and I didn’t prepare?” So you go to work hashing out 101 different situations that might happen so you can come up with a solution or response for each and every one.
It’s like you’re writing one of those “choose your own adventure” books where your choice leads to different pages and multiple endings. You’re thinking through all the different possible paths you could go and what the ending is going to look like for each and every one.
Don’t you feel tired just thinking about it?
This tiredness isn’t a lack of sleep problem unless you’re addressing how to sleep better with anxiety, since that anxiety likely comes from your worry over the “choose your own adventure” you’re authoring in your mind.
But in all seriousness, this level of mother exhaustion is a sign that you are relying too much on your own strength—and not enough on God.
As a mother, you carry an enormous mental load.
You replay conversations.
You worry about your kids’ future.
You mentally solve problems at 2:00 in the morning.
You run scenarios over and over again, trying to prevent pain, mistakes, or failure.
And slowly, without realizing it, you’re taking responsibility for things God never asked you to carry alone.
That’s when stress turns into chronic stress.
That’s when anxiety and stress grow louder.
That’s when mom burnout — also known as depleted mother syndrome — takes hold.
And no amount of sleep fixes it, because the exhaustion isn’t coming from your body alone.
It’s coming from your mind and your soul.
Remember that verse: “The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.”
Notice what restores you here.
Not striving.
Not doing more.
Not figuring everything out.
But being led.
When you stop letting God shepherd you — and start shepherding yourself — you become a mother tired in ways that don’t make sense on the surface.
Have you ever watched a basketball game where the team consists of one person - one person running offense, defense, blocking shots, sinking baskets… Of course not! It’s impossible for one person to do it all! But as a mom, that’s often what you do. It’s no wonder your body is exhausted and your mind feels like you never got over pregnancy brain.
But let’s take this a step further. When you think about that one-woman basketball team, she is also calling all the plays, anticipating all the right moves, she is essentially coaching herself through the game. Can you see how that’s a recipe for disaster on the basketball court?
What’s crazy is that’s exactly what you do as a mom! You are trying to be your own coach in the game of life, replaying past game tapes, coming up with new strategies for how to handle future games, and calling all the plays while the game is in action. But that is God’s job!
God is your shepherd, your coach, trying to guide you and coach you on what to do each day, how to handle things that pop up, and even trying to call you to the bench to rest while he sends in another person to complete the plays for you.
It’s easy to ignore him though or not even hear him because he’s not one of those coaches screaming from the sideline. 1 Kings 19 tells us that God is the sound of a gentle whisper.
It’s impossible to hear him when your internal dialog is so loud dealing with the mental load of problem-solving, worrying about replaying the past, and anticipating the future. You’re not letting him shepherd or guide you during times like this and that heaps on the stress and anxiety, depleting your energy and leaving you feeling tired to the bones.
When you live in constant mental problem-solving mode, your nervous system never shuts off. Your body stays on high alert. Cortisol stays elevated and your brain never truly rests.
This is why an exhausted mom struggles with better sleep. Why anxiety keeps you awake. Why mommy brain feels foggy. And why you feel overstimulated and on edge all the time.
Over time, this stress impacts everything: Energy for moms disappears. Patience
shortens. Joy fades. You start feeling like a failure as a mom — even when you’re doing everything.
Here’s the good news.
God never intended you to live this way.
There is a wonderful daily devotional by Sarah Young called Jesus Calling. One of its daily reflections says,
“You know that this day will bring difficulties, and you are trying to think your way through those trials. As you anticipate what is ahead of you, you forget that I am with you - now and always. Rehearsing your troubles results in experiencing them many times, whereas you are meant to go through them only when they actually occur. Do not multiply your suffering in this way! Instead, come to Me, and relax in My Peace. I will strengthen you and prepare you for this day, transforming your fear into confident trust.”
Mama, the solution isn’t to do less, it’s to carry less. Let go of the mental load of trying to shepherd yourself and trust God to shepherd you through all the things life throws at you as a mother.
We are going to learn how to do this by applying Psalm 23. Remember, the sheep don’t figure out the path on their own. They follow their shepherd.
When you let God lead—not just spiritually, but mentally and emotionally—your stress begins to release.
Your anxiety loosens its grip.
Your soul finds rest. When you trust Him to guide you, God will lead you beside peaceful streams. He will renew your strength. And from that renewal, you will have more energy. Mom burnout will disappear and you’ll finally find joy in motherhood again.
Here are three tips to letting go of the mental load of being a mom and trusting God to shepherd you.
Tip #1 is to tune your ear to God.
Practice hearing his voice. Pray, read the Bible, talk to him, sit quietly in silence & listen, go to mass at church every weekend. The more you focus your mind on God, you begin training yourself to look for him on the sidelines of your life so you can hear him when the troubles in life get loud.
The Holy Spirit prompts you, nudges you to do these things but the distractions of life will tempt you to say no & put it off. The more you say no to these promptings from the Lord, the less you hear, and the less sensitive you become to the Holy Spirit.
As a mother, it really is hard to make time for God, to quiet your mind and patiently listen for His still small voice. But the more you practice this, the easier it becomes and you will begin to feel a peace within you that surpasses all understanding. That peace comes when you reconnect with God, refocus on him intentionally. And that peace is the most effective way to conquer mom stress.
Tip #2 is to stop leading & start following.
God is your shepherd, let him guide you. That means don’t take action until you first go to God. Lay your concerns, your struggles, your ideas, and your solutions at the feet of God, seeking His wisdom.
Sometimes that sounds like: God, I don’t know what to do here, please help me, please give me guidance, tell me what to do.
This is how to roll the mental load burden off your shoulders and onto God’s. You’re telling God you trust His wisdom more than yours and that opens the doors to supernatural solutions.
This can be an interesting experience, you never know how God will respond. Sometimes an answer is revealed in your mind and as soon as you take action on it, the problem is resolved quickly & easily.
Sometimes there is no answer and in your waiting, God resolves the problem himself or by using other people.
Sometimes there is no answer & the struggles may even be getting worse but God is using this time to grow you in ways that you’d never be able to without this waiting period.
And sometimes you’re already taking the appropriate action but the resolution needs more time so you just keep plugging away.
That leads us to tip #3. Trust God’s timing & trust God’s process.
Do you remember how so much of mom exhaustion comes from trying to gain a sense of control through worrying? Another way moms can grasp at having control over protecting their children is through the subconscious belief that things have to be done when you want, how you want. That includes expectations on when and how God should resolve your worries.
When you trust God’s timing, you stop living with the silent belief that everything has to be fixed right now. So much anxiety comes from urgency—If this doesn’t change soon, something is wrong. During that time, your body stays in a heightened state of chronic stress worrying until things are fixed. Trusting God’s timing loosens that urgency, allowing your body to rest, knowing that even if it’s not fixed now, God WILL fix it.
But you must also trust HOW he will fix it. And sometimes his solution doesn’t match your solution. Honestly, I’ve found that the majority of stress in my life came from worrying that God wouldn’t fix my concerns how I wanted them fixed. But God works all things out for good, it’s not always pain free but it’s pruning you so you can grow.
Trusting God’s process changes how you interpret difficulty. Instead of seeing struggles as proof that you’re failing, you begin to see them as part of your (or your child’s) formation.
When the brain stops labeling every challenge as danger or failure, cortisol drops and emotional regulation improves. You begin to appreciate the process, observant to how you and your child are growing, and you begin to live in excited anticipation of how God is going to use this struggle for good.
Trusting God’s process gives you permission to be human. It breaks the lie that a good mom should have everything figured out. Instead, you begin to understand that growth—yours and your children’s—is gradual. This removes the pressure to rush outcomes, which is one of the biggest drivers of worry and mom burnout.
There’s also a powerful shift in control. When you trust God’s timing, you no longer have to mentally rehearse every possible future. You don’t need to replay conversations or anticipate worst-case scenarios to feel prepared. Your brain gets relief from the constant “what if” loop, because you’re no longer trying to manage outcomes alone. That mental space creates more energy, clearer thinking, and better sleep.
Trusting God’s process restores peace because it realigns roles. God is the Shepherd. You are the sheep. Your job is faithfulness, presence, and love—not perfection or constant fixing. When you live from that truth, your identity shifts from manager of outcomes to faithful follower of Christ. That’s a lighter role to carry.
And here’s the beautiful ripple effect: when you trust God’s timing, you become calmer and more grounded. Your kids feel that. They sense safety instead of pressure. They experience a mom who responds instead of reacts, who listens instead of rushes. That environment fosters connection, emotional security, and growth—without you having to force it.
Ultimately, trusting God’s timing and process gives you your life back. It replaces striving with surrender, urgency with peace, and fear with hope. And from that place, motherhood stops feeling like a constant race—and starts feeling like a journey God is actively walking with you, one day at a time.
St. Teresa of Ávila once said:
“Let nothing disturb you, let nothing frighten you.
All things pass; God never changes.”
Mama, the weight you’re carrying isn’t proof you’re strong. It’s proof you’re trying to figure it all out on your own. You’re trying to take the lead when you’re meant to follow.
When you understand that God wants to lead you to the best things in life, you don’t have to worry because you have confidence that God will guide you. And while the journey may not look exactly how you pictured it, He will lead to something better as you are pruned and grow through the process.
Over the years I’ve watched moms shift from completely worn out to quietly restored—not by changing their schedule, but by changing who they rely on.
The moment you stop carrying everything alone and lean on God, he will give you rest & strengthen you. Your energy will return. Your sleep will finally rejuvenate. And you will feed joy even in the messy middle.
Not because life gets easier—but because the pressure on you is gone. You won’t be showing up as the one-woman basketball team and coach anymore, doing it all on your own. Instead you’ll be listening to God, trusting Him to figure it out, and following Him as He guides you through it.
Remember, you don’t have to rely on your strength or wisdom alone.
If you are a tired mom listening today—wore out, exhausted, overwhelmed, and tired of everything—I want you to know this:
You are still a good mom.
You still are deeply loved by God.
And this season does not define you.
Burnout is not the end of your story. Renewal is coming.
Let God restore your soul—so you can show up with energy, peace, and find joy again.
Thanks for joining me for this episode of Conquer Mom Stress. If today’s conversation encouraged you, hit follow and leave a review. That lets me know that these episodes are hitting the topics you need.
And while you’re there, share this podcast with another mom who might need to hear it.
Remember, this is your place to pause, reset, and start conquering mom stress — one small step at a time.
Motherhood isn’t meant to drain the life out of you.
It’s meant to be lived with joy, even on the messy days.
And together, we’re gonna find that joy again.
