How to Refuel Your Patience With Kids When You're an Overwhelmed Mom

patience with kids regulate your nervous system stress relief Nov 11, 2025

💛 Have You Ever Felt Like You’re Out of Patience by the End of the Day?

You start the morning with good intentions —“Today I’ll stay calm. Today I’ll be present with my kids.”

But by bedtime, you’ve yelled, cried, or shut down.

And then the mom guilt hits hard. “Why can’t I hold it together for the people I love most?”

If that sounds like you, mama, you’re not failing — you’re just running on empty.

In this post (inspired by Episode 13 of the Conquer Mom Stress Podcast), we’ll explore:

Why so many moms feel emotionally spent
How stress rewires your brain, and
How to refuel your patience tank with three simple, science-backed strategies you can do in 60 seconds or less.

☕ When Your Tank Is Empty, Patience Runs Dry

A couple years ago, I had a normal Tuesday — school lunches, emails, laundry, repeat. But by 6:30 p.m., I was done. My son was dragging his feet at dinnertime, and I snapped.

Instant regret. Instant mom guilt.

It wasn’t that I didn’t love my kids — I was just stretched thin.

That moment led to a powerful realization:

Moms aren’t failing. They’re depleted.

💭 Why Overwhelmed Moms Lose Patience

Every day, you’re trying to do all the things — managing the house, handling emotional needs, and putting out fires left and right.

All that multitasking keeps your body in constant alert mode.

Your nervous system gets stuck in fight-or-flight, flooding your body with cortisol.

When that happens:

Your heart rate spikes.
Your muscles tense.
And your prefrontal cortex — the logical part of your brain — shuts down.

That’s why you can’t stay calm even when you want to.

It’s not a lack of willpower — it’s biology.

You literally can’t access patience when your body thinks it’s in danger.

That constant state of alert leads to mom burnout — and it’s why you feel anxious, irritable, and disconnected from the family you love most.

🧠 The Science Behind Patience (and Stress)

When you’re constantly reacting to noise, messes, or whining, your brain is running on overdrive.

This keeps your nervous system dysregulated, and you live in survival mode — not connection mode.

But when you intentionally pause to regulate your nervous system, everything changes.

Even one minute of deep breathing helps your body switch from fight-or-flight to rest-and-digest mode.

Your cortisol levels drop.

Your oxytocin (the bonding hormone) rises.

And suddenly, you’re able to respond from love instead of react from exhaustion.

✨ The Secret to Refueling Your Patience Tan

Most moms think they need a weekend away to relax.

But here’s the truth — your body doesn’t need hours to reset.

It needs 60 seconds.

These are Micro-Moments of Calmness — tiny moments you can take throughout the day to calm your mind, body, and heart.

🌿 3 Strategies to Refill Your Patience Tank

1. Calm the Chaos in Your Mind

When you take a breathing break, focus your thoughts intentionally.

If your mind stays filled with frustration (“Why can’t they just listen?”), breathing won’t help.

Instead, use that time to focus your mind on God.

Ask Him for peace, guidance, and strength.

This mental refocus lowers anxiety by helping your brain release control and return to a state of trust and safety.

“Jesus, help me.”

That simple phrase shifts your mindset and your body chemistry at the same time.

As you breathe, your vagus nerve activates — your body’s built-in calm button — and your stress hormones begin to lower.

2. Relax Your Body, One Muscle at a Time

Even when you pause, your body can stay tense — like a deer in headlights.

That tension keeps your nervous system alert and prevents real rest.

As you breathe, intentionally relax your shoulders, stomach, neck, and jaw.

Let each exhale signal to your body, “You are safe.”

This small shift helps your body release stored tension, lower cortisol, and restore your emotional control — which naturally increases your patience with kids and family.

3. End Each Pause with Gratitude

After your final breath, whisper a quiet “thank you.”

Gratitude triggers dopamine and serotonin — your brain’s natural feel-good chemicals.

This rewires your mood instantly, helping you shift from anxiety to appreciation.

You’ll feel lighter, more hopeful, and more connected to your kids — without needing to change your circumstances.

You’re not just reducing stress — you’re changing your mood in one swift moment.

🙏 Words of Encouragement for Overwhelmed Moms

Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths.

— Etty Hillesum

Your patience doesn’t come from perfection.

It comes from connection — to God, and to your kids.

Even one minute of deep breathing, gratitude, and faith can reset your entire day.

You can’t pour from an empty cup, mama.

But when you fill yourself — with peace, prayer, and purpose — your calm becomes contagious.

🌸 Scripture for Today

“Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in all ways. The Lord be with all of you.”

— 2 Thessalonians 3:16

God will give you peace at all times — you simply have to take the time to ask Him.

Let’s Keep Going Together

If this encouraged you, here’s how you can take the next step:

🎧 Listen to the full episode of Conquer Mom Stress Having Patience With Kids When You’ve Got Nothing Left to Give
💬 Share this blog with another mom who needs the reminder that saying no doesn’t make her a bad mom
✍️ Submit your biggest mom stressor at jillgockel.com/ask—your question might be featured in a future episode